Monday, December 11, 2006

Foot in mouth and heart in hand

Last week I was forwarded, three separate times, a video called "Government employees" (You can view it here.) A man and a woman, both in business attire and carrying briefcases, ride a fews steps apart on a moving escalator in the atrium of a large building. The escalator stops. The government employees remain standing still, look annoyed, look at their watches, comment on the fact that they're already late and 'don't need this', and finally start calling for help as if they are trapped in a stalled lift.

It might have been my mood when I watched the video, but I felt it wasn't quite funny, and needed something extra to work as a punchline, rather than just the title.

I usually get overly irritated when I'm forced to stand still on an escalator. I hate it when people stand side-by side so you can't walk past. Yet I will often stand there glowering rather than asking them to move aside. In the London Tube stations they have signs telling you to stand to the left, or maybe it's the right, either way it was great, because there is always a path to walk through.

I like to walk fast, especially when shopping, and an escalator is a way to go faster.

But sometimes I'll find myself on a tired or just very relaxed day, simply gliding along on the escalator, watching the world go by. When I realise I'm just standing there, then I feel like I'm a hypocrite (even just in my own head).

If there is one thing I hate, it's being caught out in hypocrisy. I think that's behind my indecisive nature to some extent - if I don't pick a side I won't risk becoming a hypocrite when I later find out more information and have to change my mind.

So, I guess what I'm getting at is....ummm.....

....the other night I found myself gliding again. Gliding rather fast actually, though a roadworks zone (60 km/h) at the normal speed limit of 80. Oops.


Anonymous said...

Chicks and speed, man.
They either go to fast or don't know how fast to go.

zjcroft said...

I completely understand the escalator thing, it really annoys me when people are inconsiderate...but on the other hand, what are we rushing towards?. I reckon my new years resolution is to go with the flow...or carry a sharp implement!

bertie said...

My whole "increased patience when shopping" thing seems to be going OK (no murders for months!), so don't get me all riled up with your well thought out arguments for people being more considerate ;)

I know I'm certainly not rushing towards anything, so have no excuse for impatience :)

Olivia said...

Anon, a considered response, thanks for that.

And zjcroft, I know what I'm rushing towards - more knitting/making time! Walk faster on the escalator, sit longer on the couch. (or scan through one more shop...but fast)

J said...

The Christmas season makes me very schizophrenic - in one shopping trip I can oscillate from trying to spread love and joy - thanking all shop assistants profusely, humming carols and giving to buskers and beggars a like... then I am hassled, bewildered and down right grumpy - snarling and grumping at the incredibly slow moving shoppers and grimacing at the tinny muzac Christmas carols and duelling buskers (total weird meshing (or not) of sound). The malls seem to be populated by slow moving pod people but all the cars are going really fast - tis a wacky time of year.

louise said...

I'm completely oblivious to other people on escalators. I'm that annoying person taking deep breaths at the top before having 3 false steps before finally braving the beast.

If it's speed you're after on escalators can't go past Russian built escalators on the Prague subway. Talk about terror!